Warstory of Attrition: SubVersion vs. Hipmonlee

The new Suspect Ladder really is fantastic fun. Even though it will eventually be used for testing a whole bunch of questionable Ubers, right now the freedoms provided by a Garchomp-less metagame are being enjoyed by all. To take advantage of these few - but major - changes, I built a new team especially for the Suspect Ladder and set to work bringing up my rating on my Barmy account.

I'd faced some very good battlers over the past couple of days and had received quite the ego boost from my performances, but I was still pretty nervous to see that in only my second battle of the day I'd be facing none other than Hipmonlee. Knowing that Hipmonlee is a pretty knowledgeable battler in general, I prepared myself for the challenging fight to come.

The Teams

Barmy (me):

Leftovers: Porygon2, Hippowdon and Salamence.


Hipmonlee:

Leftovers: Celebi, Gyarados and Jirachi.


Leftovers will be omitted.
Sandstorm will also be omitted.

So without further ado, here it is:

The Battle!

Rules: Ladder Match, Sleep Clause, Freeze Clause, OHKO Clause, Evasion Clause, Species Clause, Strict Damage Clause
Hipmonlee sent out Bronzong (lvl 100 Bronzong).
Barmy sent out Alakazam (lvl 100 Alakazam).

Hipmonlee: sup
Alakazam used Trick.
Alakazam obtained Lum Berry!
Bronzong obtained Choice Scarf!
Bronzong used Stealth Rock.
Pointed stones float in the air around your foe's team!


TrickZam is the only unconventional Pokemon on my team, but just one turn into the battle and he's already earned his spot. Trick is a downright bastard of a move when the opponent isn’t expecting it; In one fell swoop I’ve essentially ruined his Bronzong for the match. Having already crippled one Pokemon – who I know is going to switch – I set my sights on crippling another.

Barmy: hey
Hipmonlee switched in Celebi (lvl 100 Celebi).
Alakazam used Thunder Wave.
Celebi is paralysed! It may be unable to move!


My plans come unstuck a little bit as Hip switches to a Natural Cure Pokemon. Thunder Wave will only be a mild annoyance to Celebi, however I'm still feeling confident I can grab the offensive upper-hand here with a quick switch to Heatran.

Jerry Seinfeld has entered the room.
Jerry Seinfeld has left the room.
Barmy switched in Heatran (lvl 100 Heatran).
Pointed stones dug into Heatran.
Heatran lost 12% of its health.
Celebi used Thunder Wave.
Heatran is paralysed! It may be unable to move!


Jerry doesn’t stick around long enough to make a witty comment on how I just got screwed. Heatran is generally a great switch-in to Celebi, but with Garchomp gone, Thunder Wave is suddenly far more viable on the forest pixie and I pay a heavy price for my mispredict. My Heatran holds a Life Orb so he hasn’t been completely crippled, however he no longer outspeeds the things he really needs to. That said, he still resists anything Celebi might throw at him, so I take little time deciding to attack.

Hipmonlee switched in Tyranitar (lvl 100 Tyranitar).
Tyranitar's Sand Stream whipped up a sandstorm!
A sandstorm brewed!
Heatran is paralysed! It can't move!
The sandstorm rages.


The sandstorm begins and my Heatran is fully paralyzed against a healthy Tyranitar. Although I’m still upset that Heatran has been neutered, I'm not ready to sacrifice him just yet. As long as this isn’t a MixTar, I’ve got the perfect counter waiting in the wings and you bet I’m going to use it.

Barmy switched in Hippowdon (lvl 100 Hippowdon).
Hippowdon's Sand Stream whipped up a sandstorm!
Pointed stones dug into Hippowdon.
Hippowdon lost 6% of its health.
Tyranitar used Stone Edge.
Tyranitar's attack missed!


Hippowdon starts his own Sandstorm and Tyranitar's Stone Edge whizzes right by. Even an Adamant CB Stone Edge would only have managed 24% maximum anyway, so the miss is fairly inconsequential. I'm a bit worried now though, funnily enough because I wanted that attack to hit. I've seen Stone Edge, but I have no idea what item he's running. If it's got a Choice Band I'm safe, but if it's a Life Orb variant with Ice Beam, Hippowdon could be taking roughly 75% this turn. I don't have much of a choice, though; Until I know its set, the only move I can make is to keep Hippowdon in.

Hipmonlee switched in Celebi (lvl 100 Celebi).
Hippowdon used Stealth Rock.


Tyranitar switches out and I take that as confirmation that he's an entirely physical variant with either Life Orb or Choice Band. Hell, it could even be a DDTar; Stone Edge missing really does suck for me.

Meanwhile, Celebi is back and this time I'm in a really bad position against it. I know Grass Knot will flatten me, so I've got to get out of there. Heatran is still my safest Celebi switch-in (and I don’t want anything else getting paralyzed anyway), so I make the obvious choice and bring him back in.

Barmy switched in Heatran (lvl 100 Heatran).
Pointed stones dug into Heatran.
Heatran lost 12% of its health.
Celebi used U-turn.
It's not very effective...
Heatran lost 3% of its health.
Hipmonlee switched in Tyranitar (lvl 100 Tyranitar).
Pointed stones dug into Tyranitar.
Tyranitar lost 12% of its health.


U-Turn does laughable damage, but I'm back to square one anyway. Heatran vs. Tyranitar is still as terrible for me as it was a couple of turns ago, so I've got to switch out. Still not knowing Tyranitar's set, Hippowdon is really my only option.

Tyranitar used Pursuit.
It's not very effective...
Heatran lost 34% of its health.
Barmy switched in Hippowdon (lvl 100 Hippowdon).
Pointed stones dug into Hippowdon.
Hippowdon lost 6% of its health.


Now I know for certain it is a Choice Band Tyranitar. Pursuit being on the set is a dead give-away in itself, but the rather large 34% sustained by Heatran confirms it. Pursuit is going to bounce right off of Hippowdon’s hide, so I predict a switch is coming. I don’t know much of his team at this point, but I’m sure we both know that this is a perfect opportunity for Celebi to get back in. Hoping to avoid that situation, I make a switch of my own.

Hipmonlee switched in Celebi (lvl 100 Celebi).
Pointed stones dug into Celebi.
Celebi lost 12% of its health.
Barmy switched in Heatran (lvl 100 Heatran).
Pointed stones dug into Heatran.
Heatran lost 12% of its health.


This is better for me. Celebi can still switch or U-Turn, but at least he isn't going to get his counter in for free. At this point I’m tossing up Earth Power and Fire Blast; Earth Power will do considerably more to Tyranitar but won’t hurt Celebi should it decide to stay in, and if it does stick around it may set up one of the screens or even Leech Seed me. I can’t afford to overpredict here or Heatran will die without having done anything, so I elect to make the obvious move.

Celebi used U-turn.
It's not very effective...
Heatran lost 3% of its health.
Hipmonlee switched in Tyranitar (lvl 100 Tyranitar).
Pointed stones dug into Tyranitar.
Tyranitar lost 12% of its health.
Heatran used Fire Blast.
It's not very effective...
Tyranitar lost 23% of its health.
Heatran lost 10% of its health.


Hip makes the obvious switch that I was too nervous to bank on. Tyranitar doesn’t exactly shrug off my Fire Blast, but it doesn’t particularly worry him, either. Now I realize I’ve lost my Heatran, with Pursuit KO’ing regardless of whether I switch or stay.

Tyranitar used Pursuit.
It's not very effective...
Heatran lost 12% of its health.
Barmy's Heatran fainted.


Pursuit traps Heatran in an unfortunate position and takes him down. Now at the forefront of my mind is the fact that I've lost my best Celebi switch-in. I need to go on the offensive here and prevent Celebi from re-entering the battlefield, or else it is going to run amok. With Heatran down, the only other Pokemon I have that threatens both Celebi and my current opponent - Tyranitar - is Lucario.

5-6 Hipmonlee

Barmy switched in Lucario (lvl 100 Lucario).
Pointed stones dug into Lucario.
Lucario lost 3% of its health.
Hipmonlee switched in Gyarados (lvl 100 Gyarados).
Gyarados's intimidate cut Lucario's attack!
Pointed stones dug into Gyarados.
Gyarados lost 25% of its health.
Lucario used Swords Dance.
Lucario's attack was sharply raised.


There was no way Tyranitar - both slower than Lucario and locked into Pursuit - was sticking around to face me, so I take advantage of my free turn and select Swords Dance. Unfortunately, I'm met face-to-face with an enemy Gyarados, who knocks me down to only +1 Attack and cannot be KO'd by any of my moves. I'm scared of an Earthquake costing me my Lucario, so I make a hasty retreat to my sure-fire Gyarados counter.

Barmy switched in Porygon2 (lvl 100 Porygon2).
Porygon2 traced Gyarados's Intimidate!
Porygon2's intimidate cut Gyarados's attack!
Pointed stones dug into Porygon2.
Porygon2 lost 12% of its health.
Gyarados used Waterfall.
Porygon2 lost 20% of its health.


Porygon2 is an incredible little Pokemon who really can flourish in this new metagame, countering all the "new" threats other than Lucario. He Intimidates Gyarados and takes a paltry 20% from Waterfall, immediately alerting me to the fact that this is most likely the Bulky Gyarados spread and not the more common (nowadays) offensive spread. He doesn't have a Life Orb either, so I run some quick calcs and find that a -1 16 Atk Adamant Gyarados does 20% max to Porygon with Waterfall. With this knowledge, I’m confident Hip’s Gyarados won’t become a serious threat to me this match.

However, that doesn’t mean I’m not worried about it. As long as it’s around, I can’t hope for a Lucario sweep. My only option is to continually force it out and let Stealth Rock wear it down.

Hipmonlee switched in Bronzong (lvl 100 Bronzong).
Pointed stones dug into Bronzong.
Bronzong lost 6% of its health.
Porygon2 used Thunderbolt.
Bronzong lost 18% of its health.


I gain the rather useless knowledge that this Bronzong is built for tanking physical hits, not special ones. It is still holding my Alakazam’s Choice Scarf and thus is not a threat to me outside of Hypnosis. I decide to heal Porygon and let him take the sleep, as even a sleeping Porygon can take on a defensively-oriented Gyarados.

Porygon2 used Recover.
Porygon2 restored 32% of its health.
Bronzong used Hypnosis.
Porygon2 fell asleep!


That went exactly as expected. Porygon is asleep and Bronzong is now locked into a move he can't use again. I'm still not sure what Hipmonlee's overarching strategy is, so I have to make a safe switch here that won't leave me any worse off even if I can't kill Hip's switch-in.

Hipmonlee switched in Celebi (lvl 100 Celebi).
Pointed stones dug into Celebi.
Celebi lost 12% of its health.
Barmy switched in Alakazam (lvl 100 Alakazam).
Pointed stones dug into Alakazam.
Alakazam lost 12% of its health.


Alakazam has been sitting on the sidelines for too long and is ready to go another round. I'm comfortable with Celebi as my opponent; Grass Knot and Psychic won't OHKO and my Alakazam carries HP Ice (this is probably the strangest TrickZam ever, lol). With HP Ice also hitting a possible Tyranitar switch-in, I’m confident that bringing in Alakazam at this point was the right choice.

Alakazam used Hidden Power.
It's super effective!
Celebi lost 37% of its health.
Celebi used Thunder Wave.
Alakazam is paralysed! It may be unable to move!
Alakazam's Lum Berry cured its Paralysis!


TrickZam once again proves his worth, using Bronzong’s stolen Lum Berry to shrug off Celebi’s attempted Thunder Wave. I’m not going to lie: I totally forgot about the Lum Berry as well and I’m sure I was just as surprised as Hip was when Alakazam was freed from status. Meanwhile, Celebi takes a battering from HP Ice and can no longer comfortably stay in against Alakazam.

Hipmonlee switched in Bronzong (lvl 100 Bronzong).
Pointed stones dug into Bronzong.
Bronzong lost 6% of its health.
Alakazam used Hidden Power.
It's not very effective...
Bronzong lost 10% of its health.


Bronzong appears, resisting both my Psychic and my HP Ice. There's no point keeping Alakazam around to face a full-power Gyro Ball, so I switch to something a little more dangerous.

Hipmonlee switched in Heatran (lvl 100 Heatran).
Pointed stones dug into Heatran.
Heatran lost 12% of its health.
Barmy switched in Lucario (lvl 100 Lucario).
Pointed stones dug into Lucario.
Lucario lost 3% of its health.


Hip predicts my switch perfectly and brings in a new Pokemon: Heatran. My Lucario switch isn't looking so good any more. I don't know what Heatran he's carrying - Specs? Life Orb? Scarf? - but I'm not willing to risk it being a Scarf variant. I figure that if Hip switches this turn as well, it isn't Scarfed, but if he stays in, it is. Either way, I'm switching to my fairly safe counter.

Barmy switched in Porygon2 (lvl 100 Porygon2).
Porygon2 traced Heatran's Flash Fire!
Pointed stones dug into Porygon2.
Porygon2 lost 12% of its health.
Heatran used Fire Blast.
Porygon2's Flash Fire raised its fire power!


Porygon2 is amazing. He's asleep, but now carrying a Fire immunity which will surely force Heatran out (the fact he didn't switch this turn must mean he's Scarfed, or else he wouldn't have stayed in against Lucario). Once again not sure which Pokemon Hip may switch to, I head back to Alakazam. In terms of offense, overall he's the least threatening Pokemon on my team and the only one I'd be willing to sacrifice should the need arise. He's also an unusual switch-in to Heatran, so I hope Hip won't expect him and bring in Tyranitar.

Hipmonlee switched in Celebi (lvl 100 Celebi).
Pointed stones dug into Celebi.
Celebi lost 12% of its health.
Barmy switched in Alakazam (lvl 100 Alakazam).
Pointed stones dug into Alakazam.
Alakazam lost 12% of its health.


We’re back to this. Alakazam won’t enjoy getting paralyzed again, but thanks to constant switching and my earlier HP Ice, Celebi is within killing range. I know he’s going to switch, but to what? Tyranitar will kill me if I use Psychic hoping to catch his switch, but if I use HP Ice then either Gyarados, Heatran or Bronzong come in with ease. I’ve got no choice but to go for Celebi’s throat and use HP Ice, because of all the things that could switch in, Tyranitar is the most dangerous to Alakazam.

Hipmonlee switched in Bronzong (lvl 100 Bronzong).
Pointed stones dug into Bronzong.
Bronzong lost 6% of its health.
Alakazam used Hidden Power.
It's not very effective...
Bronzong lost 11% of its health.


Bronzong re-enters the fray and I'm suddenly left with a dilemma. Alakazam faces death to Gyro Ball here, however I don't think that is Hip's plan. The previous time we were in this situation, Hip switched to Heatran and scared away my Lucario. I also note that, with all his Pokemon now getting low on health, he is unlikely to gift me an opportunity to switch in Lucario for free.

I'm also very, very scared of his Heatran. Assuming it has HP Ice, it can outrun and OHKO all my remaining Pokemon other than Hippowdon (2HKO'd by HP Ice) and Porygon. Hip still has all six of his Pokemon left which means he has plenty of room for switching Heatran out and swapping attacks. I can't give Heatran a free switch in here or else I will probably be beaten down. Yet, if I make a move too risky, I could lose Alakazam to Gyro Ball and be in an even worse position. I ultimately decide I've got to take a gamble.

adub_banded has entered the room.
adub_banded has left the room.
Hipmonlee switched in Heatran (lvl 100 Heatran).
Pointed stones dug into Heatran.
Heatran lost 12% of its health.
Alakazam used Trick.
Alakazam obtained Choice Scarf!


ohmygodidontbelievethatworked

Heatran comes in expecting to shrug off a Psychic or a HP Ice and is instead robbed of the item that made him so threatening. I breathe a heavy sigh of relief; Although he’s not technically dead, I’ve just removed the single greatest threat to my team. Happy with Alakazam’s overwhelming contribution to the match at this point, I intend to use my newfound speed advantage to cripple Heatran further (or whatever else may switch in) and let Alakazam go out with a bang.

Alakazam used Thunder Wave.
Heatran is paralysed! It may be unable to move!
Heatran is paralysed! It can't move!


Lady luck is on my side, but in this case it hardly matters. The sandstorm is taking its toll on my psychic soldier and now he’s locked into Thunder Wave, so there's little choice but to switch him out and use him as cannon fodder later in the match. For now though, I’m going to keep him alive and switch in something more defensive.

Barmy switched in Porygon2 (lvl 100 Porygon2).
Porygon2 traced Heatran's Flash Fire!
Pointed stones dug into Porygon2.
Porygon2 lost 12% of its health.
Heatran used Earth Power.
Porygon2 lost 29% of its health.


Earth Power rather than Fire Blast is a good move by Hip, preventing me from getting the free switch I wanted. With Stealth Rock factored in, I’ve taken significantly more than I would have liked. Still, thanks to paralysis my Porygon now outspeeds him and can win this battle (as soon as he wakes up) while Recovering off the damage.

Hipmonlee switched in Jirachi (lvl 100 Jirachi).
Pointed stones dug into Jirachi.
Jirachi lost 6% of its health.
Porygon2 is fast asleep!


I've been had. Porygon2 was lured out by Heatran and now cannot touch Jirachi. In a Garchomp-less metagame, I know how damaging a CM Jirachi can be, and that's what I expect this one to do. I hope for Porygon to wake up this turn (he's been sleeping long enough!) so I can paralyze Jirachi before it gets too carried away. With my own Heatran down, Jirachi really was the last thing I wanted to see.

Jirachi used Substitute.
Jirachi lost 25% of its health.
Jirachi made a substitute!
Porygon2 woke up!
Porygon2 used Thunder Wave.
But it failed!


Porygon awakes, but it is too late. I've made a costly mistake; Jirachi is hiding behind a Sub, I don't know its other three moves and it could potentially either stat-up or hit all my remaining Pokemon SE depending on the set. Time for panic stations; My only priority now is forcing it from the field.

Barmy switched in Hippowdon (lvl 100 Hippowdon).
Pointed stones dug into Hippowdon.
Hippowdon lost 6% of its health.
Jirachi used Calm Mind.
Jirachi's special attack was raised.
Jirachi's special defence was raised.


Right, so it's a Sub/CM Jirachi with both a Sub up and one Calm Mind under its belt. Not good. Thankfully, the standard Sub/CM Jirachi does not carry Grass Knot, easing my concerns about Hippowdon’s ability to phaze it. Regardless, whatever moves it is carrying are going to deal a hefty amount of pain to my enormous hippopotamus.

Jirachi used Psychic.
Hippowdon lost 56% of its health.
Hippowdon used Roar.
Hipmonlee switched in Gyarados (lvl 100 Gyarados).
Gyarados's intimidate cut Hippowdon's attack!
Pointed stones dug into Gyarados.
Gyarados lost 25% of its health.


Things go from bad to worse. I sustain 56% and drag Gyarados onto the field. My Hippo's set is Stealth Rock/Slack Off/Roar/Earthquake, which means I'm up shit creek without a paddle against Gyarados. In my bid to further weaken it (and thus prevent it from stopping Lucario), I attempt a Roar.

Gyarados used Taunt.
Hippowdon fell for the taunt!
Hippowdon used Roar.
Hippowdon can't use Roar after the taunt!


Taunt wastes my turn. Now I've got to switch, because I can't hurt him and nor can I heal. I'm not particularly scared of Dragon Dance (Taunt/TWave/DD/Waterfall would be a weird set) and I still have Porygon2, but at this point nothing is a safe switch-in.

Barmy switched in Porygon2 (lvl 100 Porygon2).
Porygon2 traced Gyarados's Intimidate!
Porygon2's intimidate cut Gyarados's attack!
Pointed stones dug into Porygon2.
Porygon2 lost 12% of its health.
Gyarados used Thunder Wave.
Porygon2 is paralysed! It may be unable to move!


The Porygon switch was obvious and Hip has taken advantage of it. A paralyzed Porygon is in no position to use Recover against any of Hip's remaining Pokemon, meaning his time is nigh. Thankfully though, he's served his purpose well, keeping both Gyarados and Heatran in check the entire match. I fire off a Thunderbolt in the vain hope that Gyarados sticks around.

Hipmonlee switched in Bronzong (lvl 100 Bronzong).
Pointed stones dug into Bronzong.
Bronzong lost 6% of its health.
Porygon2 used Thunderbolt.
Bronzong lost 17% of its health.
Bronzong is paralysed! It may be unable to move!


Bronzong comes out to face me and I know where this is going. Bronzong has been nothing more than a glorified paperweight for Hip this entire match, but now is its chance to explode and take out one of my Pokemon for sure. With Porygon having little purpose left in this match, I let him take the fall.

Porygon2 is paralysed! It can't move!
Bronzong used Explosion.
Porygon2 lost 34% of its health.
Barmy's Porygon2 fainted.
Hipmonlee's Bronzong fainted.


Bronzong explodes and sends both itself and Porygon2 to their graves.

4-5 Hipmonlee

Hipmonlee switched in Heatran (lvl 100 Heatran).
Barmy switched in Lucario (lvl 100 Lucario).
Pointed stones dug into Lucario.
Lucario lost 3% of its health.
Pointed stones dug into Heatran.
Heatran lost 12% of its health.
Lucario used Close Combat.
It's super effective!
Heatran lost 63% of its health.
Hipmonlee's Heatran fainted.
Lucario's defence was lowered.
Lucario's special defence was lowered.
Lucario lost 10% of its health.


The conditions are now perfect. Lucario enters the fray and comes face-to-face with his old nemesis, Heatran. Now well and truly outspeeding his fiery foe, Luke goes for the kill with Close Combat. Unable to afford any other switch-in, Hip lets Heatran faint.

4-4 Tie

Hipmonlee switched in Gyarados (lvl 100 Gyarados).
Gyarados's intimidate cut Lucario's attack!
Pointed stones dug into Gyarados.
Gyarados lost 25% of its health.
Barmy switched in Alakazam (lvl 100 Alakazam).
Pointed stones dug into Alakazam.
Alakazam lost 12% of its health.
Gyarados used Thunder Wave.
Alakazam is paralysed! It may be unable to move!


Okay, so Gyarados is still kicking about and I only just now run the calculations that tell me a -1 Extremespeed (or Crunch) will never KO a 25% Gyarados. I switch out to my Alakazam and let him perform one final task for me.

Gyarados used Waterfall.
Alakazam lost 16% of its health.
Barmy's Alakazam fainted.


That is, to die. At this moment I realize that my good fortune this match has been almost entirely down to Alakazam’s involvement, and so for a moment I feel a little sorry that he ends not with a bang, but a whimper.

He’s given me the wriggle-room I require, however; Lucario can now switch back in, free from Intimidate, and take advantage of a heavily weakened Gyarados.

3-4 Hipmonlee

Barmy switched in Lucario (lvl 100 Lucario).
Pointed stones dug into Lucario.
Lucario lost 3% of its health.
Lucario used Extremespeed.
Gyarados lost 25% of its health.
Hipmonlee's Gyarados fainted.
Lucario lost 10% of its health.


With Lucario outspeeding all of Hip’s Pokemon, there was no other choice but to let Gyarados fall. Hip only needs this one last free switch to take my Lucario down and prevent it from cleaning up this match.

3-3 Tie

Hipmonlee switched in Jirachi (lvl 100 Jirachi).
Pointed stones dug into Jirachi.
Jirachi lost 6% of its health.
Lucario used Close Combat.
Jirachi lost 71% of its health.
Lucario's defence was lowered.
Lucario's special defence was lowered.
Lucario lost 10% of its health.
Jirachi used Psychic.
Lucario lost 59% of its health.
Barmy's Lucario fainted.


Sub/CM/Psychic is the set so far, which means the last move is likely Thunderbolt. I know Lucario can’t possibly overcome Jirachi without any boosts, but I don’t have any option other than to inflict as much damage as I can before dying. Lucario may have been unable to sweep here, but he has set the stage for the final stanza of the battle.

2-3 Hipmonlee

Barmy switched in Salamence (lvl 100 Salamence).
Salamence's intimidate cut Jirachi's attack!
Pointed stones dug into Salamence.
Salamence lost 25% of its health.
Salamence used Dragon Dance.
Salamence's attack was raised.
Salamence's speed was raised.
Jirachi used Thunderbolt.
A critical hit!
Salamence lost 61% of its health.


So basically I nearly have a heart attack. I’m not sure what spread this Jirachi is running anymore (the usual spread, with no SpA EVs, cannot do 61% even on a critical), but the fact this did so much suggests a very large investment into special attack. Salamence is now hanging on with 14% HP and for once I’m really, really glad I’m holding Leftovers and not Life Orb.

Salamence used Earthquake.
It's super effective!
Jirachi lost 22% of its health.
Hipmonlee's Jirachi fainted.


Jirachi, weakened by Lucario’s earlier efforts, cannot stand up to my Salamence’s +1 Earthquake. I take stock of my opponent’s remaining Pokemon – a somewhat dogged Tyranitar and a heavily bruised Celebi – and realize that I may have just won the match.

2-2 Tie

Hipmonlee switched in Tyranitar (lvl 100 Tyranitar).
Pointed stones dug into Tyranitar.
Tyranitar lost 12% of its health.
Salamence used Earthquake.
It's super effective!
Tyranitar lost 40% of its health.
Hipmonlee's Tyranitar fainted.


Tyranitar - who single-handedly ruined my Heatran earlier in the match - has no choice but to succumb to Salamence's rampage. For the first time in this entire match, I finally manage to take the lead and secure the advantage. Unfortunately for Hip, there’s no longer enough life left in Celebi to tango with Salamence.

2-1 Barmy

Hipmonlee switched in Celebi (lvl 100 Celebi).
Pointed stones dug into Celebi.
Celebi lost 12% of its health.

Barmy: really gg
Salamence used Dragon Claw.
Celebi lost 13% of its health.
Hipmonlee's Celebi fainted.
Barmy wins!


Celebi heads for the big Pokeball in the sky as Salamence and I celebrate our victory with a deliciously fresh green salad.


2-0 Barmy

Props:
- Alakazam. Honestly, what can I say? He was involved in everything and made the crucial moves when they counted. Azelf who?
- Porygon2 for restricting Hip's Gyarados and Heatran to relatively minor roles. With Garchomp gone, Porygon2 is worth his weight in gold, easily countering the new top threats in the metagame.
- Salamence for surviving a critical Thunderbolt and picking up the pieces. Lucario is cool, but Salamence is still my favorite late-game sweeper.

Slops
- Heatran. Timid Life Orb Heatran is usually pretty good, but getting crippled by something you’re totally meant to counter and then ultimately being beaten down by a move you resist is absolutely not cool.
- Alakazam ending up as a meatshield. :(
- Critical hit on Salamence sent me into cardiac arrest.

Two final props, of course: One to Hipmonlee for being an amazing battler (and not quitting after being fucked out of two Pokemon :D) and another to the Smogon Shoddy staff for providing us with this amazing new server to play with! I know that “Standard Metagame minus Chomp” is only a temporary thing until we start testing for other stuff, but I for one will be enjoying this server immensely for the coming month.

Hope you all enjoyed!
 
Lol, Celebi salad.

I believe this is the second time I said this in a warstory.
But, good match, nice warstory.
 
I really, really liked this warstory. You've got a known player, a somewhat unusual set performing excellently, and the whole thing is well written. Bravo.
 
I really, really liked this warstory. You've got a known player, a somewhat unusual set performing excellently, and the whole thing is well written. Bravo.
Quoted for emphasis and truth. This is one of very few warstories that has had me enthralled to the very end.
 

Hipmonlee

Have a nice day
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I think you were a little hard on my bronzong, it set up stealth rock, it allowed me to set up jirachi, and it took out porygon.

I lost this game when I twaved Alakazam, I dont really remember what I was thinking but I must have forgotten the lum.

Have a nice day.
 

Stallion

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I loved the story, and have even added a similar Alakazam into my current trial team :). Well done to both of you
 

Pocket

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Yea, I didn't find Alakazam as amazing as you initially expressed it to be when it merely swapped items with Bronzong and then TWaving Celebi. But taking Heatran's Scarf and rendering Celebi unusable contributed a lot to this match; Your TrickZam was impressive.

I really liked the few turns where Celebi constantly used Uturn to eventually break Heatran. But not having a turn to Recover really screwd it up after a folly of TWaving Lum Zam.

You should try HP Bug Zam so that it won't get walled by Celebi (as it only 3HKO), Tyranitar, or Starmie (or Jirachi / Metagross) =d. You can deal with Salamence with Porygon2 and Heatran anyways. Psychic + SR is more than enough.

It was sweet to see DDmence sweep, though.
 
Phenomenal warstory. I love how getting Garchomp and Deoxys out of the game is opening up so many new possibilities. Thanks for sharing!
 

Farmer

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Nice match and well written.Im suprise Trick worked on heatran since on wifi if you trick and dont have a item it wont work.
 

JabbaTheGriffin

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amazing read and well played battle on both sides (besides the whole lum fuck up! though i guarantee i would have forgotten too - hell i always forget when one of my pokemon is sleeping!)
 
Awesome game, Subversion. Once again this shows how potent Porygon2 is. And I second the HP Bug mention on Alakazam, being able to do 61-72% to even Calm 252/252 Celebi is awesome. I can't count how many people I surprised like this.
 
Really nice warstory. The Suspect ladder removing Garchomp seems to make a lot more strategies viable, and it was nice to see a less-used Pokemon like Alakazam work so well.
 
this was actually one of the best warstories ive ever read

not only does it give plenty of insight into the garchomp-less ladder, it also shows some excellent prediction and planning on both sides, and the fact that subversion takes the time to explain all of his reasoning makes it that much better.

5 stars if i still had a badge

edit:
Nice match and well written.Im suprise Trick worked on heatran since on wifi if you trick and dont have a item it wont work.
yeah what the hell?
 
I think I have to agree with many of the others and say this was actually a war story I enjoyed reading (I wish I could write them that way).

When you got Bronzong's Lum Berry, I actually wondered if that would be useful. Obviously, it was.
 
archivable, imo. Good read and all that was said. Just further saying it I guess

Nice zam use as well, that was impressive
 
Very good warstory, Subversion, I've read many other warstories but yours is one of the top reads for me and also the use of Porygon2 makes it all that much more fun for me to read:)
 
Brilliantly executed, old chap. You and Hip were really going toe-to-toe the whole time. One one hand, it's amusing that Hip's one fatal mistake might have ultimately cost him the match, but it proves more entertaining in the long run than a more evenly matched contest, as luck might have ended up playing a more decisive role.

As it stands, this a a testament to skill in a Garchomp-less game.
 
Great story, I loved your comments as they really showed your strategy and how you were thinking throughout the battle.
It sure does seem that twave has gotten a boost with the subtraction of Garchomp from the metagame.
Again it was great read, I enjoyed it a lot.
 
You should try HP Bug Zam so that it won't get walled by Celebi (as it only 3HKO), Tyranitar, or Starmie (or Jirachi / Metagross) =d. You can deal with Salamence with Porygon2 and Heatran anyways. Psychic + SR is more than enough.
You're right, HP Bug Alakazam is pretty neat. HP Ice was actually the last move I gave to Alakazam - after the rest of the team had been made - and I realized I didn't have a quick dragon-killer. I suppose I must have still been unintentionally considering Garchomp, because Salamence is handled by Porygon2 quite nicely and I haven't yet had problems with a Dragonite. Thanks for the tip!

And thanks for all your responses everyone. It's encouraging to see my first warstory get so much positive attention!
 

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